Another night at work.

Dear woman who peed all over the toilet seat,

Please be advised that you should probably not shop at a home improvement store anymore. Anyone who cannot figure out how to pee into a toilet should not be trusted with power tools, a hammer, or even non-toxic cleaners.

Hovering is not an effective method of urine disposal, and your ass cheeks aren't going to catch a disease from a toilet seat.

In the event that you should attempt to hover at another retail store in the future, please be advised that, in fact, no one else in the world is filled with the desire to clean up your bodily fluids. If you cannot help but pee all over the seat, then clean it up your-fucking-self.
Okay?

Thank you in advance, from all us retail drones,
Chloe

Dear [home improvement store which has the distinct honor of employing me],

Please be advised that retail is a harrowing, soul draining job. It allows for you to be verbally abused by assholes and idiots, while also allowing you the monotony of a assembly line job. There is no need for you to further demean and humiliate your hard-working cashiers by forcing them to clean a public restroom.

Managers get paid much more for less horrible work, why not have them do it? Toughen them up, a bit, so to speak. Or perhaps, you could employ a janitor. Who would clean the bathrooms, no?

Thank you for your consideration.
Hugs (oops, forgot to wash my hands first!),
Chloe

Dear creepy old men who hit on me,

1. You are at least 20 years older than me.

2. Quit fucking staring at my boobs.

3. Your wife/girlfriend is right there.

4. Dude, your kid is right there.

5. I don't like you, I'm just being polite.

6. Please, just be polite back, or go to another line.

Thank you.

Hey, my face is up here!

Chloe

Gah! Troubles are on the horizon.

So, the main reason I decided to just go ahead and make the leap to blogger was so I could finally design my own template. What can I say, I'm just a do-it-myself type of girl.

But... blogger has it's own special brand of html. And it's not stuff I already know, like diaryland's %%entry%% type stuff. And I really don't have the time to tinker around with the template now. But it sounds like basically, I have to start from scratch again. I mean, sure. I've got the color codes and images I want to use now, but I'm going to have to redesign the layout of the page to take advantage of blogger's features... and I still can't figure out how to do a links page, one of my desires for a long time.

I was hoping there would be a site with information on how to do your own template, with a special section on blogger. With useful code, placement info, etc. Blogger itself does have some info, but it's a bit scattered.

Anyway, I promise this site will get at least somewhat interesting in the next few months, not all template/ html gibberish.

Until then, check out my archives at the stepchild!

If any of the more "seasoned" (mmm, oregano) template makers have any tips, please share them. Thanks in advance!

Yeah, here I am.

Hi! For anyone who cares, my name is Chloe, and I am from that olde red-haired stepchild, diaryland. That's right: http://chloeishere.diaryland.com/ I finally just decided to go for it, and get a blogspot addy. Because:
1. Free image hosting (unless I am very sad and wrong).
2. Well, actually, that's about it. I have that old template I designed over the summer just sitting on a floppy, waiting to shine. Of course, I probably still won't get it up for a while because I am too damn busy, bee-yotch. But, I'll try.

Call me old school, but I really prefere to do my own html. Well, of course I'm old school. See above... I'm storing the template on a floppy disk, for pete's sake! Letting an editor do it for you is so cheap and easy. Anyone can type and hit buttons-- well, anyone can learn how to do html, too, but I did learn it, so I wanna use it! And now I'll have to enter a new site on StatCounter and Haloscan... but that can wait for another day.

Until then, welcome to a new era of Blah blah blah.